“La-la-la-la, la-la-la-la, El-mo’s sooong…”

Don’t lie! You are singing right along with me right now—at least you are if you are a parent. Who can resist that adorable tune? Or that adorable little furry red monster? Little did I know that cuteness is just a façade. Elmo is a vicious fiend who reaches through children’s brains and grabs their hearts with a steel grip. Ok, that’s an exaggeration—but not by much. Our family has crossed over into a post-Elmo world—but I’m fighting to get back!

I have two boys who are two months away from 2 years old (that’s a lot of 2s). They’ve watched very little TV in their lives, and most of what they’ve watched has been sports (when mommy and daddy both want to watch football!). We’ve focused these last two years on books and just playing.

Well, the boys starting showing some interest in Elmo recently. So for Christmas I thought it’d be fun to get them an Elmo video. Couldn’t hurt, right?

The video laid dormant by the TV until my husband took a four day business trip recently. Without my usual help during cooking time, I broke the seal on the video and popped it in, excited about having a little time to do the things I needed to do.

So we watched the video once a day for the four days and I’ll admit it was nice. But slowly, things changed.

Suddenly, my children became, well, monsters—and honestly, not as cute as Elmo. They whined for Elmo constantly. After a little over a week of watching the Elmo video, here’s what I’m living with.

SLEEPING
Pre-Elmo
My kids are excellent sleepers. For the past 6 months or so, they’ve consistently spent from 7:30 p.m. to 8:00 a.m. with a two-hour nap. Putting them to sleep had rarely been a struggle. When we put them in their cribs and tell them it’s time to go to sleep, they do.

Post-Elmo
The first day we watched the video, they wouldn’t nap at all. They literally bounced around their crib for two hours. At least they were having a good time! A few nights ago, one of them wouldn’t go to sleep until 11 p.m. FOUR HOURS after usual bedtime. You’ll never guess what he kept asking to do. Yup, “Elmo.”

EATING
Pre-Elmo
When the boys woke up in the morning, the first thing they asked for was milk and something to eat. They ate breakfast everyday without a struggle.

Post-Elmo
Guess what is the first thing they asked for when they wake up now? Right again, “Elmo.” Twice in the past week, the boys wouldn’t eat breakfast at all.

PLAYING
Pre-Elmo
When daddy got home from work, they’d spend an hour of the evening playing with him and roughhousing. It was one of my favorite hours of the day.

Post-Elmo
Who wants to play with daddy when Elmo is around to entertain us? Daddy’s out. Elmo’s in.

So there you have it, folks. In one week Elmo managed to take down our entire sleeping, eating and bonding system! So, after a week of Elmo, I’ve decided the TV still isn’t right for my kids—at least not yet. I really think one thing you have to learn about TV is that it’s fine to be enjoyed in moderation. I just don’t think my kids are old enough yet to understand that concept. So, our family is on an Elmo-detox program.

We made it through last night and all the whines of “Elmoooo!” and came very close to losing our minds, but we pulled through. In the night I had to bring my son into bed with us, and I woke up this morning to his head directly over my face and the dreaded word, “Elmo?” We’ve got a long way to go.

I should say though that once I feel like the boys can handle it, Sesame Street seems like a great program, and will probably make up a good part of their viewing. Do you agree? What other programs do you recommend?

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